What's with the politics these days? It seems that everywhere you look you see people saying things like, "Ohhhh, Democrats, they make me so mads!" or "Republicans suck big time!" It seems to me that what we really need is a new political party with fresh new Idears tm. and a new mascot and a new secret handshake (only to be used in case of a party emergency or whenever). I assume that this task has fallen to me so I've gone ahead and developed a new party off the top of my head. We will be called The New Old-timey Flex Masons and our logo/mascot will be a unicorn riding a dragon riding a rainbow (The unicorn and the dragon will be wearing aviator goggles and aviator scarves which will look totally rad I assume). Our motto will be, "Oooooh Snap people who aren't us" and we will run for offices under the platform of free ice cream for all. We will push to have the national mascot or whatever changed to a Dinosaur jamming out on an electric acoustic guitar; his name will be Dinosaurous Rocks! tm.. For the new secret handshake we will punch each other in the face until someone cries. (The last person who cries at our national convention gets to be the presidential candidate!) I bet more people watch our national convention than either of the other two lame parties (The convention will also be hosted by future-robots who speak in guitar-jamming-solos and have a secret vendetta against all of humanity. Also, pretty ladies in skimpy tank-tops and sweat pants and leg-warmers will be dancing the whole time! See, wouldn't you tune in for that!) Ooh! Ooh! We would also have party sleepovers with scary movies and popcorn. Ooh! And we would settle all in-party arguements with knife fights! Ooh, and I'm the boss of the Party. Are you guys with me!?
P.S. Justin is right, Fuck You Sarah Palin.
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